Closet Hoarder

I find myself to be a hoarder of fancy clothing.
Clothing that I rarely wear, that I possibly got for a special occasion but have never worn again. Clothing that I can’t bring myself to get rid of, because of how pristine it still is.
When the opportunity arises, I find myself accumulating more formal clothing, for the possibility that I will at some point in the future, go to a fancy party.
This clothing occupies a special section in my closet, which has slowly managed to take up more and more space over the years.
And it only recently occurred to me that I don’t go to fancy dress parties, that I collect things that I don’t use, and that I am a hoarder of formal clothing.
The easiest way to remedy this situation would be to start going to fancy dress parties. Or simply start wearing fancy clothing to normal events. Or perhaps, to stop purchasing causal clothing, so that I may be forced to wear the nicer clothing.
It doesn’t seem like a difficult thing to do, yet, every day I find myself wearing jeans and a shabby t-shirt.
I fantasize about situations where I might theoretically want to wear fine clothing, and then I remember that it would never happen. Not once ever have I been to a gala, met royalty, or been to a formal new year’s party.
I’m not sure why these garments were created, it doesn’t seem like anyone actually needs to own them.


My perpetually single friend

I have an friend who is perpetually single. I’m sure we all have at least one.
He always talks about his desire to have a girlfriend, but is weirdly picky in the rare occurrences when a lady expresses interest in him.
Never going on more than 2-3 dates, and always revising his criteria to include more nit-picky specifics, he seems to be actively trying to remain single, while insisting that his dream girl is as easy to find as 1-2-3.
I can only hypothesize that his problem is mental because he looks fairly normal; early 30s, thin, shaved bald, but has an eccentric beard, and is obsessed with playing a certain mobile game.
Even though he’s already met a few women who meet most of his criteria, he insisted that they weren’t good enough, for various reasons never before mentioned.
At this point, even if he meets the woman of his dreams, he won’t have any dating-experience to behave in a regular-relationship style with her.
Socially stunted, his approach to dating misinterprets a ‘hangout’ as a ‘romantic date’. He will invite ladies to go on outings and ‘hangout’ while playing a mobile game, all the while believing that it’s a date, but not conveying any romantic intentions to the lady.
I’ve tried to tell him that being in proximity isn’t the same as being in a relationship.  It’s a kind of delusion similar to where you think you’re friends with your waitress, because you go into that particular restaurant frequently enough to know her name.
We all assume that he believes that a lady will do all the relationship leg-work, and he just has to sit back and wait for 1 that he likes.  And None of us are sure where he got this idea, since he isn’t terribly impressive; not talented, wealthy, or charismatic; not to mention, living like a college bachelor.  And he absolutely doesn’t have an endless parade of women throwing themselves at him.
Yet there he is, year after year, always single, and complaining that meeting women is hard and he’s getting old.

social media lookups

Out of morbid curiosity, I looked up an Ex.  I’m sure we’ve all been curious about people from our pasts. People we haven’t thought about in years. The social media stalkerish tools make it extremely easy to find people anywhere in the world. There’s a phone in my pocket, constantly beckoning.
Anyway, I’m not sure what made me think of them after all these years. Maybe a movie I watched, or a dream I had. Might’ve just been the holiday season, which always seems to knock me off balance.
I just wanted a peek, to see if they aged well. If they’re happy, married, chunky, ect. I wasn’t looking for anything in particular, but I did want to look.
Modern social media has really changed how a lifetime is documented. Photoshop, filters, selfies, I can’t be sure of what I’m seeing.
Is everyone having glamourous adventures? Or are they just really good at overhauling their average lives in real-time, with photo manipulation and social media.
The photos I found were inconclusive.  Destination pictures; too selective to convey a narrative. Sparse; too few to establish habitual behaviors.
I don’t truly feel like I know anything real about them. But such is the nature of social media.